Everyone goes to sleep early and without ten quarrels.
I get to kick back and watch television, whatever channel I like; I flick through nine channels.
I’m left snacks: eight carrots that have been carefully sliced for me, seven biscuits, freshly baked. Six beers.
Then in the morning, five kids and the wife are excited to see me, they beg me to get out of bed four times. Then they cheer three times because I drank the beer and ate the snacks, before handing me two gifts.
And finally, for Christmas breakfast, we toast to one nice glass of champagne.